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On Women, War, & Motherhood

"Yet, when war ends, women are the first to pick up the pieces. Where there is no market place, they go door to door. When homes are destroyed, mothers and daughters haul stones to rebuild or plow fields together" – Zainab Salbi, founder of Women for Women International

Recently we had the treat of having Walids mother with us.  Walid was born in Lebanon.  His father is Lebanese and his mother is American.  At 20 years old Walids Mother left her home and family behind in New York, to start a new life as a young bride in Beirut.  

Arriving in the 60s when Lebanon was the "Paris of the Middle East" (PARADISE LOST: MEMORIES OF A GOLDEN AGE from the Aramco World Magazine September - October 1982, Vol. 33 No. 5 ISSN 0003-7567.) my mother in law learned the language, she made friends, and adapted to a country which would come to be her home.  During her time there she had 5 children, all of whom were born in Beirut.  

Throughout their time they experienced unrest and war.  They came and went, always hoping for peace, until finally, after the Israeli invasion in 1982 in Southern Lebanon they left for good.  

During our evening dinners in Barcelona we spoke about the affect this had on Walid, her youngest son, who was 3 years old when they left his childhood home.  They came to America, where they spent a summer in Maine with family.  Walid, as a child, was terrified to leave his mothers side for over a year.  His mother suspects that her entire family suffers hearing loss as the bombs dropped around them.  She has vivid memories of holding her 2 year old son and covering his ears to try to protect his hearing.  There is a selective memory loss that continued through Walids childhood, but through her nurturing, Walid grew into a happy, healthy young adult and now man.  

Our most recent visit: me, my Mother in Law, and Walid
(from left to right)

As we had these conversations my thoughts were drawn to mothers around the world who are doing the same thing, the best they can for their children.  

I was lucky enough to have grown up in a stable country, with a stable family, but there are so many who are not.  My husbands family was lucky to have escaped the country safely.  

There are so many who do not/have not had these options, but women continue to forge onwards.  There is no choice.   In many discussions with the participants in Women for Women International, a huge goal is to acquire skills and ability to help give their children better opportunities and a better life than the life they lived.  

To quote E.M Forster: "I am sure that if the mothers of various nations could meet, there would be no more wars." 

Women for Women International helps less fortunate Women in so many ways, and the recent conversations we shared re-enforced how much it does to help.  

A movie I would suggest on Mothers and war is:
Where do we go now, directed by Nadine Labaki

Amazon.com

In an isolated Lebanese village, the mosque and the church stand side by side--but religious tension threatens to boil over, particularly as a series of pranks escalates into ever-increasing hostility. The women of the village, both Christian and Muslim, concoct improbable schemes to defuse the tension, including hiring a troupe of Ukrainian belly dancers. Where Do We Go Now? veers back and forth between wrenching drama and cheerful comedy but somehow maintains a balance. Director-actress Nadine Labaki leads her mostly nonprofessional cast with heart and fervor. This commitment allows the movie to juggle the broad comedy of the mayor's wife pretending to channel the Virgin Mary and the grief of a mother losing her son to a random bullet. In a particularly poetic moment, the belly dancers take a tour around the town and discover that the cemetery is segregated into Christian and Muslim plots; even in death, the town is divided. Where Do We Go Now? has been a huge success in the Middle East and deserves to reach an audience in the broader world, both for its message of compassion and its vivid emotional power. --Bret Fetzer

21st anniversary of the Bosnian War

"Yet, only years after the Nazi-era, millions were sent to their deaths in places such as Cambodia, Bosnia and Rwanda, and the world once again took too long to act."
Allyson Schwartz

A very powerful exhibition marking the 20th anniversary of the Bosnian war last year.  This year marks the 21st anniversary.

Click here to read more

Sarajevo Red Line (locally: Sarajevska Crvena Linija) is the name of the memorial event organized in cooperation between the City of Sarajevo and East West Theatre Company which commemorated the Siege of Sarajevo's 20th anniversary. It was held April 6, 2012 in the main Sarajevo street and it consisted of a large chair installation, street exhibition of war posters and a concert. Authors describe Sarajevo Red Line as a drama and music poem dedicated to the Sarajevo citizens killed during the 1992-96 siege of their city. (From wikipedia)

Life Ice

I have been lucky enough to have early samples of LifeIce to help me get through my first 3 adventures.  Coming up later this month they will be available to everyone.

Story

They Say From Tragedy Comes Triumph.

This Is The Story Of LifeIce.

The idea for LifeIce was borne out of the innovative recipes made to comfort, hydrate and nourish my mother, who was battling ovarian cancer.

When she no longer could eat regular food, doctors suggested giving her ice chips, as it seems many people respond to the soothing cool crunch of ice. And my mother was no different. But, while the ice was hydrating her, it lacked any nutritional value.  So, in the family kitchen that I grew up in, using a variety of fresh and healthy ingredients, I began blending and then freezing flavorful batches of “nutritional ice chips.”

My mother ate these nutritional ice chips – and only these nutritional chips – for the next few weeks. Defying all odds, she stayed with us well beyond the doctors’ expectations. Every one of those extra days was a gift that I never imagined I could give.

With LifeIce,  I hope to bring this same gift to anyone and everyone, whether you’re in need of an extra nutritional boost or just looking for a healthy frozen snack or dessert alternative.

In honor of my mother, a portion of LifeIce net proceeds will be donated to ovarian cancer research.

- Paulette Fox, Founder of LifeIce

Buy yours later this month...stay tuned!

Team Hoyt-a true inspiration

 Yes you can!

Team Hoyt is an inspirational story of a father, Dick Hoyt, and his son, Rick, who compete together in marathons and triathlons across the country.

Team Hoyt strives to help those who are physically disabled become active members of the community. Join us in spreading Team Hoyt's message,  Yes you can!

Breaking news! We have a new adventurer in the mix!!!

I have such a cool Godmother!!!!

Hi Guys,

Ok, you have both inspired me.  I have decided to do my own mini (maybe over the course of two or three days)  I don't like the all sport pool so I'll have to wait until the swim club opens and I'll start with the swim and then do the bike (maybe my real one or maybe the gym) and then I'll do the treadmill.  I'll let you know how I do.  In the meantime, I'm going to the gym to bike today.  I'm aiming for 12 miles.  I haven't been feel great so I feel like its always another start over to get back to the routine but I have to start somewhere.

Thanks for the inspiration!

Andrea

Monday Guest Post from Mike Kristofik! (on his 1 week Iron Man)

I like to exercise. I like to sweat. I like to stay healthy.  So when a friend introduced me to triathlons years ago, I was lucky to find all three things I like into ONE place---triathlons.

Now some of you out there are über fit and have done the real deal, the full ironman triathlon. 
And some of you may be couch potatoes just thinking about an exercise program.
And some are probably in between those two.

No matter where you are on the exercise and fitness spectrum, you CAN do an ironman!

Lets review.  Triathlons are swim,bike,run programs.  Because you must train  for three different events, the advantage of less boredom with workouts, and less injuries to your body becomes a big advantage. When your legs are beat up from a long run or bike, rest and recover with a swim the next day . When pool boredom sets in, go biking or running. You get the idea.

Most triathletes start(wisely ) with a sprint or short course triathlon. Usually a 1/4 mile swim, 12 mile bike, and a 3 mile run.    Roughly, if you double those distances, you have an Olympic distance triathlon, and double again you have half ironman, and when you double that you have the full ironman , 2.4 mile swim, 112 bike, 26.2 run, And that adds up to 140.6 miles. 

So recently when I was growing a it bored with my winter workouts, I decided to motivate myself with a weeklong ironman. Last Friday, as I sat spinning indoors on my bike, I had the thought, before the week was over, I wanted to ride 112 miles.  As I often used to run 20-30 miles per week, a marathon in a week seemed reasonable. And finally, I try to swim 1-2 times per week, again, covering 1-2 miles per session.   

So do the math, it is a fairly attainable goal if you go the the gym and have pool access. The daily recommended dose for each ,if done over seven days would be, 16 miles of biking, about 3.5 miles of running, and about 1/3 mile swimming.

If you are a beginner and need to stretch it over two weeks,or even a month, so what! Go for it, cover that 140.2 miles then report back.   To those über fit, shorten up the time frame,maybe 5 days) . I can picture doing this really, in 2 or 3 days over a long weekend.  I have done indoor century rides on a Saturday morning, from 5 am to noon, with a few good James Bond movies or something to watch and entertain!   Running two half marathons in a weekend is not  unheard of , so squeeze in some pool time and an ironman weekend could just happen.

But the challenge is for ALL.  I really would like some beginners to cover the distance whether it be a month or so, to get a taste for the sport. Then ,who knows, maybe someday, you'll find the willpower and determination to put them together into a 17 hour day, and you too, can be an official "ironman".  Ya gotta start somewhere!

In addition to my reporting on "ironman in a week", and encouraging others to try it, I simply wanted to add this:   Exercise for itself is great. Keeps you health and feeling good. But combined with fundraising for any good cause, even better.   Examples are easy to find! Walid (Colleens husband, my Son in Law) raised over $5000 for Alzheimer's research with Athletes to End Alzheimer's for an Ironman he did this summer, yWhen Colleen was 14 together we raised $6000 for Team in Training with the Leukemia & Lymphoma Society.
(by the way, our "honored patient" who we ran for when he was 5 years old with leukemia, is considered a full recovery, now looking at colleges for computer network security.) Nice to think our running the Disney half marathon and fundraising helped a little bit there, gave hope and health to this little guy ,who got a chance to become a big guy!

So that's another BENEFIT from exercising, personal goals and fundraising goals, can actually be fun! Like running up to the top of the Rock for MS which I did last year with another daughter and her boyfriend, what a thigh burning, lung splitting blast we had !

So it is good to see great organizations like Eric Stewart with Viridian energy , and John Meadow of LDV Hospitality supporting your my daughter Colleen, her 12 adventures, and Women for Women International.   

 And what better way to carbo-load than with a delicious ,award winning spaghetti at LDV managed, owned by Walid SCARPETTA NYC. (A huge supporter of Colleen, through Scarpetta and in being a great husband)  Good exercise sessions deserve Great food!   If I lived in NYC I think I'd eat there every night! 

GOOD LUCK, train slow, steady and smart! Stay healthy!    MIke Kristofik

Family portrait.  (From Right to left)
Me, Mike Kristofik, Allyson Kristofik (training to run a 1/2 marathon and working to open a Women for Women Campus chapter at St. Michaels University), Lisa Kristofik (Ran up Rockefellar center fundraising to find a cure for MS), Michelle Kristofik (works for Americorp & playworks, in training for the 3 day Susan Koman Walk to end Breast Cancer this June) Kathy Kristofik (my wife and supporter of all!)  Colleen Abuhaidar who I am guest posting for, and her husband Walid who fundraises for Athletes to End Alzeeimer's.
Also featured Pepi the Papillon (Colleens frequently blogged dog and Hershey the family poodle who went to his happy hunting grounds shortly after this photo)